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Wild Wild West (1999)


The story opens in Louisiana in 1869. A man fitted with a magnetic collar runs through a forest trying to escape a large spinning saw blade flying through the air. The saw blade eventually catches the man and decapitates him. From the decapitated man's perspective, we see another man in a Confederate Army general's uniform seize the saw blade, which is engraved with a large emblem of a tarantula.In a town called Morgan, West Virginia, Army Captain James West (Will Smith), hides out in a half-filled water tower. While he has a romantic evening with a beautiful woman named Belle (Garcelle Beauvais), he sees a small unit of Confederate soldiers arrive and load up a wagon with boxes of nitroglycerin. West remarks that he'd been waiting for the men for a week and that they're under the command of General "Bloodbath" McGrath, the man who'd retrieved the saw blade. The horses attached to the wagon become jumpy and cause the wagon to weaken the already rickety water tower, spilling West, naked, into the storehouse where the men are taking the nitro. West battles with them briefly, retrieves his clothes and jumps onto the wagon (which has no driver now). He finally takes control of the wagon, which almost goes over a cliff overlooking a saloon called Fat-Can-Candy's, or Fat-Can's. West sees that McGrath is in Fat-Can's.Meanwhile, in the saloon, McGrath (Ted Levine) draws the attention of two burlesque performers. One of them, Rita Escobar (Salma Hayek), is pushed aside by Artemis Gordon (Kevin Kline), who wears a drag disguise. After Gordon sings "Sons of the South" for McGrath and his men, McGrath drags him upstairs. They pass a room where a bundle obviously containing a struggling man is being tended to by McGrath's men and into an empty bedroom. McGrath wears a trumpet style hearing aid because he lost his ear at Chickamauga. Gordon hypnotizes McGrath with a belt buckle equipped with two swirling wheels and begins to question him about missing scientists, including Dr. Escobar. McGrath responds like a dog until the wheels begin to fail and his hypnosis is broken. At that moment, West bursts in through the window and punches McGrath, who falls stunned to the floor. West tries to dismiss Gordon, saying he's going to execute McGrath. McGrath wakes up and charges West, knocking them through the wall and into the next room. McGrath then runs out of the room, joining his men carrying the bundle.West and Gordon get in each other's way trying to apprehend McGrath, so McGrath and his men escape with the scientist. West identifies himself as being with the U.S. Army, while Gordon identifies himself as a U.S. Marshal. While West and Gordon argue about who has the authority to arrest McGrath, in a nearby carriage, Dr. Arliss Loveless (Kenneth Branagh) watches the scene, while his assistant, Miss Lippenrieder (Sofia Eng), reads their lips. Loveless releases the wagon carrying the nitro, letting it roll down the hill, directly into the saloon, where it explodes.West rides to the White House a few days later and meets with President Ulysses S. Grant (Gordon in disguise) in the Oval Office. West reports that his efforts to arrest McGrath were thwarted by another agent, Gordon. Grant begins to praise the talents of Gordon when West draws his revolver and points it at him, calling him an impostor. Gordon insists that he is the president and West shoots at the ceiling of the room. Gordon admits that he'd been posing as Grant; West tells him that he noticed Gordon's Harvard class ring, which should have been a West Point emblem. The real Grant (also Kevin Kline) enters the office and tells the two they'll be working together on a new mission for him. Grant shows them his intelligence room, where he states that the nation's top scientists in physics, hydraulics, and explosives have been kidnapped by McGrath, and that West and Gordon have been working on the same case. Grant shows them a note that tells them that an unidentified despot is using the kidnapped scientists to develop a new weapons system far more advanced than any in existence. The conditions are the surrender of the United States government within one week. The note came with a cake of the White House infested with tarantulas, apparently from McGrath. Grant gives West and Gordon one week to track down the mysterious enemy.The two travel in a specially equipped train, the Wanderer. On the way, Gordon makes use of the head of the man killed by the giant saw blade, Dr. Thaddeus Morton (Michael Sims), whose retinas are imprinted with the last image he saw, General McGrath. The image also shows that in McGrath's coat pocket is an invitation to a costume ball in the Garden District of New Orleans. When they arrive in New Orleans, the two have a brief argument about how to infiltrate the ball undetected. West chooses to simply dress like he always does and sneak in. Gordon opts for the costume of a Russian frontiersman.At the ball, West watches McGrath from a distance upstairs. West fools Dr. Loveless's personal assistant Mae Lee East (Bai Ling), who thinks his uniform is a costume. When the party officially begins, a large papier-m